New parents have a bed reputation for being overbearing, too rigid and strict and worried for nothing ... because according to the generation before us, yes I'm talking about our parents, we turned out "fine".
I used to agree. When I was pregnant. In fact I didn't even buy any parenting books, and thought the best source of information were my midwives and my family.
Now that I have a child however, I realize that I was wrong. I'm exactly the kind of over bearing parent I've described above and I couldn't care less about your opinion.
I love my son more than anything else in the world. And when you love someone that intensely, their wellbeing becomes your obsession.
So yes... I do have hard limits and cringe at he thought of my baby eating junk food... but who the hell cares? Is respect too much to ask for?
The midwives have also done a wonderful job of empowering me to be confident in my decisions about parenting. My family as well, my mom told me to trust my instincts when it came to baby, and I love that.
Despite being called beautiful often (weird to say out loud)... my brain is my best asset. Straight A's in school aren't the reason I think I'm smart either. However, my thirsty brain and will to never ever stop learning is.
That being said... before having a child, my intelligence was never questioned, at least not blatantly and to my face because educated people that love to read have sources and arguments locked and loaded! And If you're not ready for a proper discussion, based on updated research and facts, frankly, you'll get schooled. #DoYourResearxh #WhatsYourSource?
After having a child... suddenly every single decision I make gets questioned. It's as if my intelligence melted away when I looked at his angelic little face... ok, I'll admit It may have, momentarily upon first glance, but I promise you, my brain doesn't let me down often because it's well fed, and often!
Why do people like feeding other peoples babies? Honestly I never ever thought this would be an issue before becoming a mom. But I noticed that people often treat babies like life-like dolls. So much so that they want to change them when they don't need changing... and feed them when they've already been fed. It's exhausting having to keep an eye on your baby at a party because at any given moment someone is trying to give them some kind of randomness.
I didn't want to write this posting, but when I found out my 1-year old was given pop, I thought I'd reach out to my mom community for tips. What shocked me was the amount of women that shared the same problem as me. It's not just about me anymore... in fact it never was. If you feel offended by this post it was not my intention to do so. If you feel like it's written about you, it probably is. But hear me out...
Please understand that It's not about "rules" but respect. Respect for what we are trying to provide for our child's wellbeing. And when it becomes difficult to deal with our child after seeing you we are very hesitant to continue this relationship where you are supervising alone. We need you to respect what we are trying to provide. I'm not against junk food, just against giving it to someone that doesn't know what it is or need it. This is a crucial time for their development, and if you love them as much as you claim to, you would do the same. Spoil them in different ways! With love, gifts... why does junk food have to be in the "reward" category? Frankly, your relationship with food is not the kind I'd like my child to have. I'd rather trust the experts that have studied the negative correlation between junk food and the overstimulated brain and addiction. There's even evidence of sugar being more addicting than cocaine! If you think about it, our blind acceptance of it in our households is an obvious reason, because you're allowed to be addicted to sugar and likely won't see jail time because of it. But there are more reasons why it's considered dangerous for babies.
Good Nutrition habits start from home. I'm not depriving him of anything, just giving him the tools to explore and love real food; nutritious foods that will contribute to his healthy brain and body development. One day he will inevitably beg me for junk food... I'd rather that be done with actual words when he's old enough to speak. Not with temper tantrums and screams because he is too young to have the words. I am not the enemy here! Stop making it seem that way. This decision is fueled by love for my 1-year old... nothing but.
Grandparents and other junk food feeding offenders need to understand that babies will love them even if they don't give him junk to eat. They will still have a special bond without sneaking around with a crummy trail of sweet treats, I promise. So please don't doubt that, and don't doubt us. I'm not an extremist, just conscientious about good health and nutrition, for both myself and my family. I want to pass on good habits, not encourage bad ones... out of love. I need you to respect that or I'll find another sitter, It's that simple.
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